IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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