this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
