Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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