I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
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