Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Randomize
