you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
