just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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