I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize