I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
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