when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
