my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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