if only i could text you this smell
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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