Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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