He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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