so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
