He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
