We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
