she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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