my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
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I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
cat food counts as protein by the way
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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