y did u give ur computer a hand job?
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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