well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
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