Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
her vagine was all disorganized.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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