Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
