Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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