dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Randomize