i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
