I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize
