I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
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