he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Girls should come with a carfax report
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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