the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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