Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize