i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
