Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
