Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
two words...techno handjob
Be still, my beating vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize