At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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