WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
how drunk are you?
Several
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
