I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
