Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
