Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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