I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
