well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize