real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
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