bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
