brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
FUCK WHALES
Randomize