dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize