ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
