Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize