He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
