NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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