normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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