There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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