HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize