Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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